Today is another boring saturday. I slacked at home for the whole day without doing anything. Planned to go for a swim in the evening but the weather turned bad and I overslept. Ha.

Why is life so contradicting? During exam period I kept wanting to go out and do things I like or blog, but when exams are over I just stayed home and do nth? Neither do I feel like blogging anymore. Haix. Life is juz so weird.

Hai why must life be like that? I am going off le. TaTax.

Finally my group handed in the PW report today. The feeling is great coz it symbolises that PW is coming to an end soon. *PhEw* Had a short day in school today. Attended the talk abt SMU early morning. It was quite interesting and I found out that SMU offer courses on psycology. =)

Well, after school I went out with zhengang, allan, wanyi, eggie, rachel, chenyu n yexian. We went to bugis and pei allan eat lunch. I bought a yam pie from old chang kee and also tako pachi + mango tea. HeHex. After that we went walk walk. I suggested taking neoprint coz there are 8 of us there so it will be easier to split the bill. HaHax. It was so fun, we kept laughing loudly while taking pics. But some of the neoprints dun contain all of us coz it is quite crowded with 8 of us inside.

After that we went shop around in bugis. Wy bought a new schedule book for year 2005 that is disney princess. (Not sure if I got the name correct not) I wanted to buy too, but I didn't coz I am not used to using cute stuffs and that I wanted to get a schedule book which I can refill. Dun ask me why, I just like to do that. HohOx. Tried my best not to spend extra money today coz I am quite broke already plus I don't wish to overspend.

Wy went off earlier and the rest of us went for dinner. I was damn tired by then already. Rachel, zg and me didn't eat dinner outside cos my mum is cooking and I really don't wish to withdraw anymore money from my bank. Thus the greedy me watched the rest eat. =S

Reached home at ard 7pm. So tired lor. Walk until my legs ache!!! Haix. Den watch tv and slack, I just love the feeling of being in holidays. Next week will be the last week. I am really looking forward to it.. But when holidays come, I may not look forward to it again.. Stupid me..

I have to drop a subject. Though this is not really what I wanted, but I suppose it is just as well. Since the sch force me to drop, I can focus on 3 subjects. I am praying hard for the rest of my subjects ok. I am really praying hard. I intend to drop LEP already. Not that I can't pass, but I just duno what course can I enter in future with LEP.

I am not really in a mood to blog today. Just felt very tired, tired of thinking what pdp to join. I dun wish to join something that is v slack, neither do I want to join something that is too stressful and exciting. HahAx. Think I might end up in CPC. =X I also duno what else I can join, just find something that got my classmates in so that I can get in easier and then at least got company. Hope eggie also make up her mind abt what she is joining.

Going off le. Bye

Today is the day when I die. Why? I got back all my results. Woke up damn early today, trying my best to drag time cos I don't feel like reaching school so early. Took a later bus but I was still on time.

First paper I got back was Maths, nth much to anticipate coz I already knew my results. Den I got back physics, nth much to guess coz I knew my results last week too. I failed physics. Well, wad to do? My physics just sux to the core. I can't even get an AO pass.. Am I really that stupid? Haix. In between also got some joke that happened to eggie and me. Ask me if u want to know, it is definitely unsafe to blog online. Once CheNYu knows it, he will laugh for a month.

After the physics paper is Chemistry paper and luckily I got an AO pass. I din expected much for Chem as I know I wun score well. But Rita walked towards me and say: "Hoi Qing (yes that's her accent), u didn't do well for chem." OH shit lah, as if I duno lidat. So I just sat there and all my suppressed emotions burst out. I cried out finally. After sooo many setbacks I finally cried. I hate Rita. There is no need for her to remind me that I failed, I know myself better than her. THANK YOU RITA.

After that got back GP paper. I was yelling with joy when I saw my compre paper got 26 and I passed my compo too!!!! I got 23. YeAh. Finally I pass my GP. =) LEP was not too bad also, at least I got my A level pass. If nth goes wrong I might get my 1 'A' pass 2 'AO' pass.

After sch went out with my classmates to eat and walk ard. This time it is without yx. Nobody knew what happened to him, he said he was going home but no one followed. It really wasn't the right time for us to say anything also. Hai. I really hope he will not worry so much. Take a step at a time ba. The world is not coming to an end. Haix.. Why must life always be lidat.

Think I shld go and bathe liaox.. Late le, still muz do pw. tAta.

Just some thoughts to blog abt. Why must there be such a thing call promise in this world? I heard it from someone before, 'promises are meant to be broken'. But if promises are meant to be broken, then why is there a need to make a promise? As expected, I am going to blog about my own feelings.

Promise just reveal the most ugly side of human. Promises are beautiful when they are made, I don't deny that promises can brighten up my day too. But underneath that promise, not all owners are true about them. Some just make promises to achieve motives or just "make others happy". But when the truth is out, these owners are nth but liars.

Then why do people still believe in promises? I look at it that human beings are exposed to harsh reality everyday that they would rather escape away from it sometimes. Hence some became victims of "sweet promises". Ok maybe I am too pessimistic and always paint an ugly picture of everything, but I was a stupid victim of promise before, so to me promises aren't supposed to be taken serious. Neither will I make promises that I can't be sure I can achieve.

Perhaps to me life is a real ugly thing. I am not trying to sound like I need other people's sympathy. But after being exposed to ugly reality for so many years, one can't help but feel cold towards certain things in life. Take for example the three brats yesterday, I was exposed to kids from young. I loved playing with younger kids, I love to act like a big sis to them coz I was the youngest at home. I can shower them with care and concern, I never ever flared up at younger kids before when I was young. But they might not think you are being noble, some just think they have the right to bully the good people. I was hit and bitten by young kids even though I did nothing wrong. Some may say they are just kids and are not sensible enough, but it just show their character. In primary school I treated two girls as my best pals and was self-less about anything, but I ended up being stabbed behind my back and was left deeply hurt.

Sometimes I wonder why is there a change in my attitude and behaviour over the years as I grew up. Is it due to my environment? Or is it due to my mentality? I seldom trust people nowadays, perhaps it was partly due to those environment I grew up in that caused my behavior. Everybody around me had been breaking promises, even those dearest to me. So, who can I believe?

Sometimes I yearn for someone who will just lie to me forever and ever and never let me know the truth. But then again, is there ever such a person that exist?

Hoho, the pic above showed yexian dancing mass dance during the open house yesterday. This pic was not taken by me, that is why the angle and picture is so nicely taken.. Hohox... If yx see this he will definitely kill me. =X It just goes to show that one should never offend a woman. =X

Anyway, yesterday was my sch's open hse. I was asked to help out at the LEP booth as that is my only cca now. But we had games earlier in the morning. We played 1.5hrs of captain's ball. I luv cap ball wor.. =) We played with our own classmates and we were divided into two teams. Well, the other team is really stronger so they won utimately. I tried my best to defend those balls of theirs already. But we still lost. Haix. Somemore Loo Kit knocked right at my stomach... Arhx.. it hurts.. Luckily it doesn't hurt now already. It really hurt alot at that time I thought I might start vomitting food out. =S

After the game we slacked for awhile before going for lunch with yx, rachel, eggie and allan. We saw alot of teachers at the hawker centre, we were saying they might be discussing our results.. =X After that we went back school and the open hse start to have ppl ard. So eggie and I walked ard in search for a new cca as well as see what ccas are there. We walked and walked until my legs hurt now. =D We also teased yx coz he sae he wan to give phamplets out to Cedarians. So whenever we saw cedar gals ard, we ask him to go. Den when he was talking to some cchs(m) gals, we walked pass him and shouted : "aiyo.. flirting ar.." It was so damn funny. He was so embasrrassed by us.

Eggie and I went to do lep duty at 3.30pm. I only sat at the booth for awhile and I was pulled to guard door for LT2 coz there's a LEP talk inside. -.-''' Anyway, Rachel's mentee brought along 2 other guys to our open hse. Fancy three p4 guys at JC open hse. -.- But they are really vvvvvvv cocky and I feel like slapping them damn hard on their face. I admit I do not love kids alot. But when I was young I DO NOT feel irritated by my babysitter's kids. They (regardless of sex) are just angels and not cocky brats like rachel's mentee. Coz I also dun like kids that are too snobbish, while those 3 brats think they own the world. They keep suanning rachel n yx n eggie and commanding them ard. Walao, if they were my kids I would have smack them damn hard on their face liaox. Who do they think they arE? Rachel yx and eggie were being nice to bring them ard when it wasn't their duty to. So they should at least try to shoot them lesser? Oh well, kids nowadays are just getting out of hand. They only know how to bully those who are nice. *siGhX*

After the open hse den I went home already, actually wanted to go for dinner but then my darling, yx, rachel, zg all went home already. So left allan, eggie and me so I say we dun go lor. After all left only 3 ppl diff to gossip. Reached home and came online and slept at 12+am. I am tired already. Perhaps sleeping early is good as I do not have much quiet time to myself to let my thoughts run wild. Sometimes I am really too tired to even think. I already sorted out all my thoughts during my study break, so there's nth left for me to think also.

Woke up early today waiting for "meteor garden" repeat telecast on tv. Kenneth smsed me at 4+pm and asked if I want to go for a movie, actually I wanted to go wan, but then I m still aching all over my body so I decided to give up the idea. Anyway, it's quite a boring saturday filled with tv and food only. That's about all le. Gtg, taTax..

Heard from Leonard that one of my primary sch mate passed away last friday. He sent me the news article url. I dun think it is nice for me to comment on who that person is here. But I tink it is quite a pity, that person's granddad also passed away two days after that. Haix..

Life really is so fragile, anything can happen to anyone at anytime. It saddens me to read about that news, he was after all one my seating partners in class last time. I still remembered we can crap and joke in class all the time. But now, he is gone. It's even more sad to read that his granddad passed away after him. It so happened my mum's fren's daughter knew him. She said he died coz his chest was hit by the soccer ball. Oh my...

Went school today and did nth also. I really wonder why those teachers dun let us go for break. They made us go back to school but they din conduct any class. Shit lo.. I rather stay at home and sleep. DotX.. The VP said that they are going to change the timetable AGAIN~ They are going to shift the flag-raising time to 7.40am. Hmm, it doesn't seem to affect me much. Coz even that 10 mins more of sleep doesn't matter to me. I would rather sit the earlier bus coz its not as crowded and I will get to sleep on bus. =X

Went for balloon sculpting class today. Ok lah, quite fun. But it scared me when rachel's balloon burst in front of my face. Think it scared her even more. =S I managed to learn how to make dog, mouse, teddybear, sword. HeHex. Really glad I learnt how to make the teddybear. I tried three times before I make something that looks like a bear. =) It was quite fun but I am still afraid of the balloons.

After that went to LJS for lunch with eggie, wy, rachel, cy, zg, yx. Had the triple taste combo. Crapped for quite awhile before leaving at 3.30pm and head for temasek primary school for mentoring program. Saw my mentee. Gave her one of the balloon I made. She rejected it. Oh well, wad to expect from a rich little kiddo? =) Gave her a kitkat coz I promised her one last time. She gladly accept it =). Taught her some work and then we went on to a game book. Around 5+pm, we went basketball court and play with others.. She went off at 5.45pm coz she got a bdae party tonight. Not bad ar.. got party. HaHax.

After the mentoring program, took bus home as usual. Then ate dinner, den ate fruit. Nth much also le. Then watch tv and come and blog. I am a little tired already. Think I should go and sleep le wor.. TaTax..